I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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