i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
