If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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