i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
