he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
