I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Randomize
