Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
only you would photoshop your dick
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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