How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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