# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Randomize
