Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
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