in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
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