it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
