I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
