Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
ugly people sure do ruin things
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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