You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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