so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize
