Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
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