we're chasing vodka with high fives
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I'm at about main and main street
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Randomize
