btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
