she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
