He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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