i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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