HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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