His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
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