your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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