she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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