We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize