Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
a search helicopter?!
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
