she was so not down for the gang bang
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I touched a dick in church today
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
