all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
