Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
