I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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