So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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