Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
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