Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
so explain again why im purple
no
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
