marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
being pregnant is like rehab
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
