she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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