if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
