i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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