yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
