I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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