my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
