he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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