Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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