I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
