No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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