ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
