Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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