so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Randomize
