who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Randomize
